acutelesbian:

A five year old at the gas station said he liked my “bat woman” tattoo excitedly. His father condescendingly asked how many I had. I told him I had 11. He scoffed and asked how waiting tables all my life sounded and I said, “it’s alright on the weekends, but throughout the week I’m your son’s teacher.” He walked out without another word.

english-american:

Canada: whispers it’s my birth…

America: JUST A REMINDER THAT MY BIRTHDAY IS IN THREE DAYS!!!

Canada: …day